So, I had considered writing another love-based post. You know, it's Valentine's Day and it seemed like a natural fit. Who better than a marriage therapist to post lots of hints for love and romance?
And I couldn't stomach the thought.... Why? It just seemed too contrived. Too cutsie. I couldn't do it!
So love and romance will wait for another day. Today, I want to talk about why I (kinda) HATE Valentine's Day. First of all, if you're single- I feel for you. I don't feel for you because you're single. I feel for you because on V-day... the entire world seems ready to tell you why you are inadequate. And that's lame. Don't listen.
But if you're with someone, I think Valentine's Day might actually be worse. Why? It all boils down to one thing: expectation.
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| Doesn't he look hopeful? Nope, sorry. You're fired. |
Let me put it this way:
a bouquet of roses any other day of the year
= sweet gesture.
a bouquet of roses on Valentine's Day
= a warm up.
And you don't get to know how much you're supposed to give to your sweetie either. It is an undisclosed amount that varies based on mitigating factors (like how much his/her friend was spoiled for Valentine's Day). And this sums up why I hate Valentine's Day: it's too much dang expectation. And if there's anything that kills love like undisclosed expectation, I can't think of what it is.
So today, I'll be saying roughly the Valentine's Day equivalent of "Bah Humbug".... And wishing that instead we would all just be upfront about what we truly want with each other.
(And honey, if you're reading this, just ignore me. I love V Day. And Roses.)
Wishing you and your sweetie a Happy "Death-Of-Love" Day (ha ha),
The older I get, the less "things" really matter to me. And yes, most men subscribe to the "Hey, look at me, look what I bought/got for my significant other-aren't I AWESOME philosophy of what "showing love" really means."
ReplyDeleteWhen I was 21, all I wanted was a sparkly ring, flowers and an expensive dinner. At 39, all I want is great conversation, collaboration and friendship with the person I am sharing my life with. Tell me how you feel with words and actions, not flowers and candy. That is what really matters.
Of course - I didn't throw away the beautiful bouquet I got last night ;)
Jodi T.